Sunday, February 13, 2011

Intel Overboard

This is Fenway Park's Green Monster back before the flood.  Almost looks like you could play baseball here, eh?  Hold that image.

In 1991 Intel launched its hugely successful "Intel Inside" program.  Since that time--if you are like me--you have been in dozens and perhaps a hundred business conversations where managers schemed ways to get their own logo "inside" or "powered by" or "on board" another product.

I happened to be running on a treadmill the other day, a NordicTrack Elite.  Great machine.  More gizmos than the Starship Enterprise.

And, as I'm huffing and puffing along, I realize that "Intel Inside" may have finally jumped the shark.  Not for Intel, of course, which can and should get as much mileage out of its own creation as it wants.  But for everyone else who still thinks the idea of cluttering up terrain with multiple messages is a great idea.

Along with all the buttons and gauges and inclines populating the console, I found:  "Polar heart rate Technology," "iFitLIVE powered by Googlemaps," "WiFi" (which has its own logo), and, stuck down near the bottom, either by brilliance of just last in the coveted "inside" queue: "iPod compatible." "Android," which must have been very late to the great land grab, is prominent only in the standby screen, but prominent nonetheless.

As I completed my workout a screen popped up, beseeching me to: "Make sure your next workout is powered by Googlemaps. . .Visit www.ifit.com, iFitLIVE, powered by Googlemaps."

I will be sure to do that.

Then, when I stepped off the deck I finally saw the majesty of the uberlogo, "NordicTrack Elite," and was delighted to learn (from big orange letters along the rails) that my run had been assisted by "QuadFlex Precision Calibration."

Delighted.

Could it be time to try something new?  Must everything in my tech world look like the cereal aisle of the local hypermarket?

Here, then, a more current view of Fenway's Green Monster, this time with W.B. Mason on board.  Volvo Inside.  Powered by Sports Authority (and apparently assisted by UnderArmor).

It doesn't look so good for playing baseball anymore--but it sure makes me yearn to jog in place for a few miles.